Living in LA is something I've wanted to do since I was about 10 years old, back when I was a little blond girl with big dreams in the Canadian city of Thunder Bay. So technically, at 5'2, I'm still a little blond girl, and I definitely still have big dreams. If I didn't, I wouldn't have traveled the path from Thunder Bay to Ottawa, then from Ottawa to Silicon Valley (which is part of the San Francisco Bay area, for anyone unfamiliar with California's geography), and finally, happily -- make that ecstatically -- from Silicon Valley to LA. It's a dream and home almost 20 years in the making, and to say that I'm happy to be here would be putting it mildly.

I've been really lucky. I have some really great friends here, and the last three weeks have flown by. My new office mates are great (yes, I have the job I had in Silicon Valley, and I am a VERY lucky, thankful, happy, and grateful girl), I LOVE my new home, and evening and weekend life has been a beautiful blur of friends, dinners, parties, seeing bands, hiking, and getting acquainted with my new neighborhood.

So here it is, LIFE begins. Thank you to everyone who made this possible, and who encouraged and supported my move. I love you all, and I am so very thankful and grateful.

I should start this off by saying I have not a single thing against the song or the artist. It's a catchy cross-over song, well-suited for mainstream Top 40 radio. It was more a sudden pondering of the lyrics, as I am prone to do while driving down the 101, and the realization that there are probably a lot of girls out there who relate to this song. Which, when you think about it, is exactly the problem.

A little advice to the "everygirl" protagonist: trust me babe, he most definitely does not belong with you. This is the problem that plagues a good many girls in teenagehood and in their 20s -- if I said I was never one of them, I'd be a damn liar. So here are some of the key rebuttals for any girl who ever finds herself in that mindset -- and funny, when did my blog become a dating advice column?

If he's a friend, and he hasn't tripped all over himself to be with you -- he won't. And you, "everygirl," deserve someone worthy of being on the receiving end of your time, presence, and smile. Ask any guy friend you know -- I'd say with the 1% exception case that needs to be allowed for, any guy knows if they're attracted to a girl, and how much, pretty much instantly. And believe me when I say that if he wants to date you, he will move mountains. So don't hang around waiting for him to wake up and discover he belongs with you. He doesn't, plain and simple. Do yourself a favor and hang out with other people, ease up on the contact, and find some new routines. Then, sit back and watch what happens.

If the common case (and I stay this from both personal study, along with the study of a good number of female friends and their relationships), he'll suddenly discover he wants your time, all right. Why? Because you're the good, faithful, "will always be there" girl, and you've suddenly gone and changed the game. You're not there, and wait -- how did that happen? So when he's suddenly showing interest, don't fall for it. All roads lead to that interest being lost the second things return to the previous version of normal (you being the good, faithful, "will always be there" girl). Just consider him schooled for any other girl in the future, congratulate yourself, and move on.

Same goes for the on-again, off-again boy, who is never just a friend. I'm not saying burn bridges, I'm just saying remove the expectations or the idea that it would ever evolve into anything more, and re-immerse yourself in the freedom of zest for life and dating. Then write a song about it, to help the poor souls who relate to the "you belong with me" wistfulness. Stay out of that trap, "everygirl" protagonist. Lose the longing, and turn up the smile!

If you've been following me on Twitter, or here on my blog (on those occasions when I update this blog, which is when I'm not book-writing, writing for work, or writing for the Yahoo! Store Blog at work), you'll know that I've been working on a book for the last couple of months. Things are going really well. So well, in fact, that I've just given myself a new daily responsibility: to write at least 1,000 words of my book each and every day. It's like my own version of NaNoWriMo or NaBloPoMo.

So follow along with me, here, or on Twitter, as I tackle this great goal. The pre-New-Year's resolution is to have a draft finished before the end of 2009. Between that, work, and life, I think I can safely say things are busy.

Fifteen minutes pass, and nothing. I think I see a flash behind my closed blinds, but can't be sure. There's no rain, and in the 2 years and 3 1/2 months I've lived in Silicon Valley, I'd never heard thunder. Next thoughts: Did something happen at the airport? Or over at the NASA center?

Around 4:40 a.m., I hear it again. And this time, I definitely see lightning. Welcome to the first thunderstorm I've seen since moving to California. Yes, seriously. It was different from Ottawa and Thunder Bay thunderstorms, though, in that it did not include a torrential downpour, or at least not where I was. Still, it felt like a special present from nature, just for me. I've been wishing I could watch and hear a thunderstorm for months and months now, because although I don't miss anything to do with winter, or anything to do with the unstable weather systems and tornado watches that are summer in Ontario, I've really missed thunderstorms. It was a very happy early morning.

Moral of the story: when you wish long and hard enough, anything really is possible... ;)

That scintillating piece of news aside, I just wanted to explain the current state of the photo gallery, which is back (kind of). Due to a wardrobe gallery version malfunction with a PHP upgrade, my previous gallery went where all good, non-upgraded galleries go to die. That's my fault for not updating the gallery version, and I'll take full responsibility! Having lacked the time to play with something new I'm trying out, though, the new gallery isn't yet wrapped in my site template, and currently contains only new photos and some old faves. I'll get it fully integrated soon.

Time to get some sleep!

Lots of love to everyone.

When I think of those summers, there are a lot of times I'd do anything just to get back to that inhibition. You don't realize how much more open you are, and how much less outside brain clutter you allow in to crowd your mind, until you're an adult and the pace of life sometimes overloads your brain. There are times it will get to the point of what I call "brain fuzz." I know that I have to get better at partitioning my mind, so I can flip the switch a little more seamlessly from outside daily life to okay, this is personal writing time, nothing else gets in the way. I am possibly the most fidgety person in the world (or one of them, anyway, since I think it's hereditary), but when I'm in that zone, nothing else matters.

My favorite time of day to write used to be beginning anytime between midnight and 2:30 a.m., going til about 4:30 a.m. or whenever I couldn't keep my eyes open any longer. I messed up my sleeping habits but good during one part of high school. (Didn't matter, I still graduated top of class, didn't I? ;)) These days it's early morning, beginning when I first wake up, before I can let anything else distract me. Sipping coffee and getting beautifully lost inside of that world, and relishing the morning silence.

True story: I once declined a date because of something I was busy writing, and I didn't want to stop writing just then. I think karma sometimes pays me back for that one, but enough already. ;) (Kidding, kidding.) I'd taken a week off from work, and was for the first time, spending my holidays just hanging out in the city in which I lived (Ottawa, at the time), using that time to write. I remember how freeing it was, since it was only a couple of months after I'd finished my Master's degree, which I'd done part-time while working full-time. For about two years, up until then, all of my writing efforts and free time had been spent on course work and my Master's research paper. Right now, most of my writing efforts are spent on what I write for work, but I'm getting better at shifting my mind's focus from the work writing and letting myself get back into the personal writing world, without that distracted feeling of "I know there's something I should be doing right now."

Music-wise (because music is one of the best things to help with kicking my brain over into writing gear, something learned during j-skool), I've been on a Kings of Leon, Neverending White Lights, and The Trews kick lately. Some of it's older stuff, but that's okay. I go with what inspires the flow and gets me to that place where I can sit and write for hours.

Here's to an amazing weekend for everyone, and to living dreams.

This one's for the teenager who had the novel-sized dreams. It will mean less road trips and more weekends at home, but for the first time in a long time, I have a lot to say.

If you have a couple of minutes, check out this video on Gizmodo. I was at Ellin and Jer's last night, and Jer showed it to me. As Gizmodo's Adam Frucci explains, "This installation shows all of Lufthansa's flights at once, all projected in 3D on a 180-degree, 46-foot-wide screen. And damn is it cool." Seriously COOL.

"My thoughts exactly. Oh f****** well." (Manda, to me)

"Seriously, that's 5 times since Thursday. It is time for the pool. And my vitamin water may have more than vitamins. Vitamin water cosmopolitan, anyone?" (Me, to Manda)

"At the spa and thought of you – saw a towel that said don't drink and dial – even had a pic of a cell phone and a drink with the circle/no sign around it." (Steph, to me)

"I haven't told anyone off in a text in a long time!!!! ;)" (Me, to Steph)

"Or we should go to a spa in Vegas." (Me, to Steph)

"But where is Rolling Stone based? ;-)"
"I think NY but they have to have offices in LA."
"Ok. Cuz I have seen what the east coast does to you." (Manda, me, Manda)

"Musos are prob all very very similar at a cellular level."
"And by cellular level, you mean they're insane, right?" (Not telling, to protect the guilty!)

"Forget the po-po, call a fireman. Better wheels." (Me, to Manda)

- [jennalala] is watchin' some hockey, like a good Canadian ex-pat. C'mon, Detroit, tie this game and force it into triple overtime. Good Tuesday TV!

- Um NO. I said DETROIT tie the game, not Pittsburgh get another goal. GAH.

- YEAAAAAAHHHHHH... one more, baby! One more! (Okay, two more, but one more to get this into OT!)

- Hells to the yes, POWER PLAY

- Hells to the double yes, another power play.

After which point, all went eerily silent on the subject of hockey. It was a little less painful to shift the focus to:

- #squarespace ... secretly a superhero?

When Game 6 hands you lemons, switch gears and go after a free iPhone 3G S. All the better to tweet from.

I had an amazing Shiatsu massage at Camelot Center in Los Altos, tonight. When I lived in Ottawa, I had regular massage therapy -- usually once every three weeks -- because of all the work I put my right shoulder and arm through with the web development part of my job. Once I moved here and was full-out writing, no web work, I didn't need massage therapy anymore. I'd never tried Shiatsu massage before, and found that I really like it. I highly recommend trying it. Watch for an open house.

Last weekend, I returned from my sixth trip to LA since March; next week, I'm in Boston. Busy girl!!

Then you have a disastrous week, and don't know what to think. A couple of days of being really sad, and overthinking everything. (It doesn't always help, having the memory that I have! Retains things almost photo-perfect, including things I'd rather not remember quite that well.)

Everything would have been fine if I just hadn't done this [insert stupid action A]. Everything would be as it was if I hadn't started that conversation.

Then you realize about the former, maybe. And about the latter, yes it would be. And that's exactly the problem.

I think I'm done with the part of my life where I regret honesty, when it doesn't work out to what I hoped it would. There's no shame in saying look, if you don't see this happening, then I'm not the girl who will be there when it's good for you, on whatever terms you want. Even when you like that person more than you've liked anyone in years. For lack of a more apt word here, yes, it suuuuuuuuuucks -- but if you can't let yourself go after, be open to, and find what you need... who will?

I'll fully admit that I've been that girl before. It somehow hasn't occurred to me before now that what I'm looking for is just as important, and I shouldn't be afraid to say it for fear of it all crumbling down. Why? I couldn't tell you. I know that when it comes to my non-professional life, the last two years have changed me a lot. This is one of the ways it has, and I'm glad for it.

When I left Ottawa, and moved out here to Silicon Valley, it was the start of going after my goals in life, rather than trying to make other people happy and maintain the status quo. The last two years have been amazing, and have gone by so fast, I can hardly believe it. The last few months -- beginning around December -- have shown me what else I want, and what I need for a balanced life. It's not a secret that I've been seeking relocation to LA. I have family there, I have friends from Ottawa there, I have someone who's been a close friend since high school there, along with her family, and a whole bunch of other friends there. It's a foundation, and a network, and a life. Saying that -- I love the job I've had for the last two years. In a perfect world, I'd transfer it to an office down there. So is it a perfect world? Time will tell.

This week has reminded me of something important -- be true to who you are, and what you want, and don't be afraid to say it, show it, DO it. You won't always like the answer, but those answers can help set you on the right path. As one of my favorite directors back in Canadialand truly believed, "When one door closes, another opens." He was fascinated by watching it in action. Me too. So don't be afraid to shut some doors -- you never know what's behind the one that opens next.

It was the part about "The plane was reported stolen Monday afternoon from Confederation College Flight School at Thunder Bay International Airport in Ontario" that actually woke me up, heh. Craziest story out of the city where I was born and raised since the whole Bambenek/America's Most Wanted thing.